Lord you woke me up,
but there is no speech.
Why did you wake me,
From my sleep?
I can’t hear your voice,
but I can feel your heaviness
and it runs very deep.
​
Are you grieving the memory of your Son,
when the time of his terrible baptism had come?

I can see him crying
in the Garden of Gethsemane,
kneeling down and praying
beneath the olive tree;
he has so much grief and anxiety,
that his tears begin to bleed.

How did he do it, Father?
I can’t imagine the pain
that he endured.
He knew what was coming, 
but he did not run.

I guess as a parent
I can begin to see,
the unconditional love
that you have for me.

But it was your Son, God.
How could that be?
It is unfathomable,
the grafting that is done
inside your family tree.

To die for your children
makes perfect sense to me,
but to die for your accuser
is hard to conceive.

He was wrongfully charged
by the mouths of his own men.
He was put to shame
and viciously condemned.

Yet he took it all,
like a lamb led to slaughter.
He kept your command, Father
and he did not falter.

His mouth was bound
by your own hand.
He did not deviate
from the master plan.

Genesis through Revelation
is just a glimpse,
to think differently
would be remiss.

It’s enough for the seeker
to come and explore,
but it’s only the beginning
of the fear of the Lord.
Your Spirit has revealed
there is so much more.

When we trust in Him,
we begin to see,
there’s an ocean of knowledge
that runs super deep.

All our generations
are but a blink of your eye,
to our everlasting God
who lives beyond the sky.

Jesus came to live among us
as fully God and fully man;
He came to redeem us
and restore the heart of man.

Those who know him,
will begin to understand
the parables he spoke
into this ignorant land.

Some will ask
and want to know,
Some will receive
and begin to grow,
Some will reject
and spit in his face,
Others will persecute
and have no grace.


On the night of his capture,
Judas betrayed him for “silver and gold”;
Peter denied him three times in the crowd,
he didn’t want others to know that he and Jesus were bro’s.

There were few in the crowd
who testified for him,
even when they witnessed
the miracles he did for them.

He raised the dead,
and cast demons out of men;
He healed the sick
and gave sight to blind men.
He spoke the truth
in love to them,
yet they chose to deny
that he was the Savior
who was prophesied to them.

Most turned a blind eye,
and turned their shoulder to him.
They bowed to the rulers and priests 
that lived among them.

They followed the crowd
and listened to the accusations of men,
instead of interceding
and testifying for him.

It is no different than the times
that we are currently in;
today we focus on the government,
and the laws of men.
We give praise to humanity
instead of honoring
the authority of him.

The SELF has become
the apple of our eye.
PRIDE is embedded
in the nature of “I”.

Jesus was tortured
to the point of death,
while everyone stood silent,
and lipped their regrets.

People were afraid of the rulers
who lived in their sects;
People feared persecution
bestowed to heretics.

It breaks my heart to say
that I lived among that tribe.
I was afraid to share my faith,
and instead chose to hide.

I cared so much
what people would think,
if they knew in my heart
I was a “Jesus Freak”.

Would they be mad
for not believing like them?
Would I be insulted?
Would I be condemned?
Would they laugh in my face,
And call me a disgrace?
Would they ridicule me for relying on God
and not trusting my culture's ways?
Would they twist my words
and make me believe
that I am bad
for not worshiping humanity?
Would they call me a farce
and laugh in my face,
when I screw up and
make my mistakes?
Would they assume
I was uneducated
and not skilled in men?
Would they consider me infantile
for not believing like them?
Would they call me a fool,
and think I am burden to men?
Would they accuse me of not loving,
for holding the truth up to them?
Since my master's degree is in psychology,
would my peers deny me when I highlight spirituality?


All of these beliefs
kept me in sin;
I kept missing the mark
by conforming to men.

I’m not saying
that I am good,
because by myself
I am falsehood.
But by his blood,
I am redeemed
By his blood
I have been set free.

I can stand on his Word.
I can testify to him.
I speak grace in truth,
and still love my fellow men.

I do not need to falter
by succumbing to men,
because I firmly rooted
in the Great I Am!

So on this day,
when I think of Him.
I lay down my life
in honor of him.

He died on the cross
to set me free
I can't imagine anything
that is a better gift for me.
Not only did he free me from
eternal death,
but he taught me how to repent and rest.


On this Good Friday Eve,
I sit in reverence
for my King.
Jesus sits at the right of hand of God
and makes intercession for me.

Holy Spirit, I feel your grief
the darkness is heavy
but it’s only brief.
I know your quiet,
in remembrance of him,
who gave his life to save us from sin.
so as I ponder
his great name.
I say “Jesus is my savior,
and it is his name that I will proclaim.”

Just as in the beginning
when your Spirit
hovered above the sea;
so it is with your blood Lord,
that covers all of me.
Just like when you spoke your Word,
and brought forth day and night;
so it with your blood Lord,
that separates darkness from light.
Just as it is written,
in your book of remembrance,
the angel of death
passed over the dwellings
where the blood of the lamb
was on doorposts;
so it tonight Lord
on this memorable Passover night,  
that the blood of Jesus my savior,
has resurrected me.
Just as it was in the days of Egypt,
when Moses stood for you; 
so it is in my heart Lord,
I’ll do what you tell me to do.
Just as you freed your children
the nation of Israel;
so it is with your love for
this lost and lonely girl.
You led them
through the waters
that you separated
upon your command;
you took them
through the wilderness,
and brought them into
your promised land.
Your Spirit was with them
every step of the way;
leading them by fire at night,
and by cloud during the day;
so it with your Spirit today Lord,
for those who walk according to your ways.
And just as it was when you rested
in your holy tent;
so it is today Lord,
when your Spirit dwells in the hearts of men.
Instead of living outside in,
as it was in days of old;
You now live inside out,
and this is how your story is told.
Your have ended the era
of Aaron's priests,
there is no way a man could live
up to your holiness;
Melchizedek has always been
the true spiritual priest!
Since the final sacrifice
of your beautiful Son,
your Kingdom has been advancing; 
for those who believe
He is THE ONE;
He who said, "It is finished."
has declared the battle’s been won!
We are his royal priesthood,
who no longer need to sacrifice
thousands of beasts; 
instead we die to self
and patiently endure
while growing hungry for the wedding feast.
Instead of scurrying around
trying to make ourselves right,
we get to rest and repent
under the blood of Christ.
Lord help us not forget
what your Spirit did
to deliver your children
from oppression and complete bondage.
The same power
that descended upon your Son,
is the same power
that lives in your chosen ones.
Just like when Jesus was led
into the wilderness for 40 days,
when he was tested by the devil
and when he did not stray;
he spoke the truth in confidence
as he hung on to your every word, 
is how he defeated the tempter,
and his countenance was not blurred;
so it is with us Lord
who are grafted into your vine,
may we receive your living water
and become spiritually alive.
May the valley where dry bones existed,
grow flesh and become alive and well,
in the hearts of men who love you
in those who drink from your well.
Allow the hardness of our hearts
to become brittle by Your Word,
Let the dust fall to the ground
and be transformed by what we have heard.
It’s often when we crumble
by our heart’s brokenness,
that we turn to you Lord
and ask for your breathe;
So forgive us for our sins
when we miss your mark,
and remember us for our faith Lord
and hear our heralds hark.
With Jesus as our Lord, Father
we open our hearts to you.
Where the Spirit is Lord, Father
We know freedom rings true;
So as we walk through this valley,
filled with shadow and death,
help us to fear no evil
as long as we breathe your breath;
When we go through trials
characterized by this world,
help us to remember that our final judgement
has been overturned.
Continue to give us courage,
and boldness to speak your Word,
Bend our ears to you Lord,
so that we can fulfill everything we've heard.
Cover our lives, Father 
beneath the blood of your lamb;
we hold tight to your Spirit, Father
while he carries out your plan.
Your mysteries are being unfolded
before our very eyes,
keep us from being deceived
by the enemy’s twisted lies.
May we live to see you God
as Father, Spirit and Son;
May we come to dwell with you, God
as heavenly bodies made into one.

“You will give this message
Whether you like it or not.”
“They will hear my words
Whether they like it or not.”

"I send forth my Spirit
through the blade of your mouth
vibrations will flow
so do not doubt!
you WILL l bow down
to My sovereignty
now be My servant,
so that others will see.
I am not playing
when I send forth My word!
I am the Lord your God,
have you not heard?
What I say goes
whether you like it or not,
so send forth My word
and do not stop!
You are accountable
for what I put into your mouth
so quit your chewing
before I spit you out!
They will not like
what I have to say
but it is a burden
which you must obey!
So chose for yourself
who you will serve this day!
Get ready for their anger
to come your way!
some will listen
and obey
Some will hate
and turn away
Some will fall
on bended knee
some will lap the water
that flows their way.”

In reverent fear of the Lord,
this is what HE says,

“I’ve left you alone
for long enough
you’ve been calling the shots
now I’m calling your bluff!”

“The sons of PRIDE
have stolen My crown
now it’s time for Me
to bring them down.”

“Rampant they’ve been,
looting the town
these rulers of men
are industrially proud.”

“They have dug in deep
They have burrowed their heads
They are spiritual ticks
They are demons.”

“They have set up camp
invading minds of men,
twisting the truth
time and time again”

“With head embedded
they spread their disease
the corona virus
is the creation of these.”

“The crowns of pride
have taken their toll
now it’s time for Me to
remind you of times of old.”

“Do you not remember
the people of great faith
who believed in Me
and followed My ways?”

“I gave them My Word
and they wrote it down,
I gave them My Power
to pull the asher poles down.”

“I defeated their gods
and defeated the men
who worshiped foreign gods
and bowed down to them.”

“When I sent my Son
do you think I changed?
Am I not the Father
who is set in My ways?”

“Are you really that thick
to think My plumb line has changed?
You have watered down My Word
by catering to your own ways!”

“Forgiveness of sin
is meant for Me to enter in.
It was never intended
for you to blasphemy Him.”

“HOW DARE YOU!
YOU INSOLENT MEN!”
Do you think I will allow My Spirit
to settle in these distorted hearts of men?”

“What has become of My creation?
I have to keep cutting you off at the stem,
but My pruning does not help,
when you stay rooted in your sin!”

“You have taken my scripture
and twisted my words.
You take everything out of context,
to fit your own herd!”

“I can’t remember a generation so thick?
“Love your neighbors” has become twisted and sick!
“Jesus is in everyone,
they get to have their own way.”
Are you kidding me?
You refuse to obey!”

“Universal love has watered down my Word!
The integrity of I AM is no longer heard!
Grace is good
but it does not exclude
the truth of My Word.”

“Don’t you see?
When you build your house on sand,
You will not stand
when the storm sets in!”
To those who claim
to be baptized in My name,
I tell you this,
without a heart change,
there is nothing to gain!”

“When lust is birthed
in the flesh of men
sin springs forth
and death sets in.”

“If you do not choose
to fear what I say,
but instead decide
to follow your own way,
then what can I do
when sin sets in?
Do you think My Spirit
will stay with men?”

“I am not looking for perfection,
I already know who you are!
I demand your affection,
those who set them selves apart.”

“Those who know Me
and trust in my ways
castrate their desires,
and open their hearts
for My Spirit to slay.”

“Because I love you
I have finally stepped in.
I’m pulling out the ticks
that have borrowed themselves in.”

“My servant has witnessed
the pulling out of one
with the sword of the Spirit
she opened her mouth
and got the deed done.”

“He backed right out
then stood at her side,
he panted like a dog
and looked at her with googly eyes.”

“He had many legs
but did not want to run.
He waited for re-entrance
but she would not give him one.”

“With a commanding voice,
she confidently declared,
“Get out of my house,
you are not welcome here.”

“I elevated her spirit
by building My tower,
Beneath her feet
I laid My power.”

“In an instant,
that dog disappeared.
By My Spirit,
she had nothing to fear!

“Without a host,
he could not stay.
She trusted in Me
instead of following her own way.”

“Now this is what I say
to minds of men who are in decay.
Get rid of your pride,
it is not My way!
Get rid of your pride,
do not delay!
Get rid of your pride,
by trusting in your own way!”

“Like any good Father
who has given his commands,
it’s always out of love
because he sees what has happened.
He does not want to lose his children to sin,
nor does he want to throw the towel in.
He longs for the best,
for good choices to set in.
He corrects in hopes
that his child will win.
He speaks in love
most of the time,
but he speaks with authority
when things are out of line.”

“It is time” says the Father.
“I have stood at the throne,
and thrown you a lifeline.”
“Will you grab hold,
and let go of your sin?
or will you hold tight
and die from within?”

Deep calls unto deep
It’s the nature of His seed,
As the deer pants for water
So Is my thirst for thee;

When the weight of this world
had broken my back,
and all I could do
was feel the enemy attack,
When the weariness of this life
had filled my eyes,
and all I could do
was lie down and cry.

When the sky had fallen,
and dark clouds fell upon my face,
When all I longed for
was the earth to open
and swallow my space.

When all this had happened
I felt like God was a digging a pit,
to throw me into hell
for the sins I did commit

But now that I look back,
it’s in these times that I see,
I was in his hands,
and he was allowing me,
to come face to face,
with the giants that I made,
due to my choices,
when I walked away.

When I stepped out of line
With his sovereignty,
is when I grieved his Spirit
and caused toxicity.

When “My will not yours”
was inside of me,
I laid it all down,
I knew I had to bleed.

When I came to his cross,
in humility,
is when I consecrated myself
and became a burnt offering

I thought it would be a day
for the pain to go away
but I found out very quickly
that was not his way.

A week became a month
and a month became a year
but as I shed my will
his became clear.

Dying to self
on the alter of his throne,
is when MY seed died
And I was reborn.

It was deep beneath the dirt
under thick heaps of hurt
that the seed of ME did die;
I was alone and afraid
when Jesus came
and held me while I cried.

He extended his hand
and helped me to stand,
then he led down the narrow path,
and I knew there was no going back.

At the end was a veil
that Jesus pulled back,
he led me to enter
and light filled my black.

Peace filled the space
as God's glory took place,
and in an instant I knew
I would never be the same.

The death to MY seed
Came to be,
when Jesus gave me
a taste of ETERNITY.

Time lost its hold,
when I was in his fold
of his glorious embrace.

Floating on air
I had no cares.
There was no trace
of being misplaced.
Th disgrace of my past
Did not exist
when I was in the presence
of his gloriousness.

But the next thing I knew
I was back on the path
Dressed like a warrior
ready for combat.

My heart was on fire
to fulfill his desire
of standing strong on his wall;
Fortified inside
Devoted to abide
I finally knew my call.

Dying to SELF
Opened MY seed
To release the essence of ME.

With an open heart
and his strong hand,
He squeezed out the part
that caused division
between us
to stand.

He filled me with breath
and allowed me to breathe,
As I exercised my lungs
I began to believe.

Hope was restored
as his mercies did pour;
His healing energy
transformed my soul;
Infused with his spirit
I was made whole.

So it was in the ground
I was reborn.
A warrior for Christ,
came from tattered and torn.

Shocked Awake
His Spirit did take
from death to alive
in the blink of an eye.
According to His timeline, not mine.

During this time,
we gained great intimacy.
Unfailing love
between my Creator and me.

He taught me to listen
He taught me to pray
He taught me to look in the mirror
and not turn away. 

I exposed the good, and the bad,
every part of me.
He touched my wounds
and I said, “I heal thee.”

My eyes were closed,
behind shame and disgrace,
when he gently said “look at me”
while holding my face.

I hesitantly opened them
afraid what I’d see
In the eyes of my savior
looking back at me. 

Instead of disgust
He smiled and said,
“You are worthy” and
“For YOU it was my blood that I shed.”

What was in my head
moved straight to my heart
Intimacy with God
is where Transformation starts.

On a dreary Saturday afternoon in November of 2016, I was sitting with the Lord, contemplating the meaning of my life.  I was living alone and had filed for divorce.  For months I cried myself to sleep and struggled with my sins, wondering if I'd ever find my way back.  For the first time in my life, I turned away from resiliency and being a "SURVIVOR" to brokenness and being a "GOD DIVER."  I held onto scripture like it was my last breath, and I decided to believe God's truths instead of my own.  I began replacing my fears with the Word of the Lord.  On this day, when feeling all alone, Holy Spirit gave me a vision into the great unknown.  He showed me a boardwalk with Jesus standing on it.  I was in a swamp, covered with filth and weeds.  All around me were broken and moaning souls.  I looked up from the mess and saw Jesus extending his right hand.  I did not think, I just grabbed.  He lifted me out of the pit and helped to stand.  He covered me with his robe and told me if would be okay.  He started to walk me down the boardwalk.  At the end of the boardwalk was the veil of a curtain.  He opened the curtain and led me to enter.  Upon entering, all I saw was a massive white light that I identified as God.  Around him were thousands of smaller orbs, upon which I became one.  I felt complete peace and serenity.  All of my worries disappeared.  I felt like I was home.  Next thing I know, I am standing back on the other side of the boardwalk, facing out into the swamp.  I am fully dressed like a warrior.  I have a shield and sword in my hand.  My heart had been turned and I knew in my spirit that the Lord gave me an assignment as a Warrior (which I later learned to be a Watchman on the Wall).
The visions and dreams continue.  Not all the time, but enough to know that God is real and he is showing me things that are necessary to build his Kingdom.  I also hear his voice - which is where these poems come from.  The Lord has also given me the gift of tongues, and when I do not know what to pray, I just open my mouth and allow the Holy Spirit to utter his groans so that his desires will take shape in the earth realm.