Deep calls unto deep
It’s the nature of His seed, As the deer pants for water So Is my thirst for thee; When the weight of this world had broken my back, and all I could do was feel the enemy attack, When the weariness of this life had filled my eyes, and all I could do was lie down and cry. When the sky had fallen, and dark clouds fell upon my face, When all I longed for was the earth to open and swallow my space. When all this had happened I felt like God was a digging a pit, to throw me into hell for the sins I did commit But now that I look back, it’s in these times that I see, I was in his hands, and he was allowing me, to come face to face, with the giants that I made, due to my choices, when I walked away. When I stepped out of line With his sovereignty, is when I grieved his Spirit and caused toxicity. When “My will not yours” was inside of me, I laid it all down, I knew I had to bleed. When I came to his cross, in humility, is when I consecrated myself and became a burnt offering I thought it would be a day for the pain to go away but I found out very quickly that was not his way. A week became a month and a month became a year but as I shed my will his became clear. Dying to self on the alter of his throne, is when MY seed died And I was reborn. It was deep beneath the dirt under thick heaps of hurt that the seed of ME did die; I was alone and afraid when Jesus came and held me while I cried. He extended his hand and helped me to stand, then he led down the narrow path, and I knew there was no going back. At the end was a veil that Jesus pulled back, he led me to enter and light filled my black. Peace filled the space as God's glory took place, and in an instant I knew I would never be the same. The death to MY seed Came to be, when Jesus gave me a taste of ETERNITY. Time lost its hold, when I was in his fold of his glorious embrace. Floating on air I had no cares. There was no trace of being misplaced. Th disgrace of my past Did not exist when I was in the presence of his gloriousness. But the next thing I knew I was back on the path Dressed like a warrior ready for combat. My heart was on fire to fulfill his desire of standing strong on his wall; Fortified inside Devoted to abide I finally knew my call. Dying to SELF Opened MY seed To release the essence of ME. With an open heart and his strong hand, He squeezed out the part that caused division between us to stand. He filled me with breath and allowed me to breathe, As I exercised my lungs I began to believe. Hope was restored as his mercies did pour; His healing energy transformed my soul; Infused with his spirit I was made whole. So it was in the ground I was reborn. A warrior for Christ, came from tattered and torn. Shocked Awake His Spirit did take from death to alive in the blink of an eye. According to His timeline, not mine. During this time, we gained great intimacy. Unfailing love between my Creator and me. He taught me to listen He taught me to pray He taught me to look in the mirror and not turn away. I exposed the good, and the bad, every part of me. He touched my wounds and I said, “I heal thee.” My eyes were closed, behind shame and disgrace, when he gently said “look at me” while holding my face. I hesitantly opened them afraid what I’d see In the eyes of my savior looking back at me. Instead of disgust He smiled and said, “You are worthy” and “For YOU it was my blood that I shed.” What was in my head moved straight to my heart Intimacy with God is where Transformation starts. On a dreary Saturday afternoon in November of 2016, I was sitting with the Lord, contemplating the meaning of my life. I was living alone and had filed for divorce. For months I cried myself to sleep and struggled with my sins, wondering if I'd ever find my way back. For the first time in my life, I turned away from resiliency and being a "SURVIVOR" to brokenness and being a "GOD DIVER." I held onto scripture like it was my last breath, and I decided to believe God's truths instead of my own. I began replacing my fears with the Word of the Lord. On this day, when feeling all alone, Holy Spirit gave me a vision into the great unknown. He showed me a boardwalk with Jesus standing on it. I was in a swamp, covered with filth and weeds. All around me were broken and moaning souls. I looked up from the mess and saw Jesus extending his right hand. I did not think, I just grabbed. He lifted me out of the pit and helped to stand. He covered me with his robe and told me if would be okay. He started to walk me down the boardwalk. At the end of the boardwalk was the veil of a curtain. He opened the curtain and led me to enter. Upon entering, all I saw was a massive white light that I identified as God. Around him were thousands of smaller orbs, upon which I became one. I felt complete peace and serenity. All of my worries disappeared. I felt like I was home. Next thing I know, I am standing back on the other side of the boardwalk, facing out into the swamp. I am fully dressed like a warrior. I have a shield and sword in my hand. My heart had been turned and I knew in my spirit that the Lord gave me an assignment as a Warrior (which I later learned to be a Watchman on the Wall). The visions and dreams continue. Not all the time, but enough to know that God is real and he is showing me things that are necessary to build his Kingdom. I also hear his voice - which is where these poems come from. The Lord has also given me the gift of tongues, and when I do not know what to pray, I just open my mouth and allow the Holy Spirit to utter his groans so that his desires will take shape in the earth realm.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Archives
April 2022
|