Today I write on a topic I know all too well.
In fact, I wrote a book about it. Read on to learn more. It’s a topic that often leads to divorce. It’s a topic that breaks many hearts. It’s a topic that rips many families apart. It’s a topic that cuts God straight to the heart! The topic is Adultery, and its what happened to me, and my marriage and my family. It’s “the thing” that almost killed me, and its “the thing” that saved me - my eternal life with God. Coming to terms with adultery is what led me to repentance at the cross. Let me try to explain what adultery means to God, without making a whole book out of this poem with my own personal experience. But - if you want to know more about my personal story, then you can find my book on Amazon. It’s called, Spiritual Healing After Adultery: A Memoir of Hope. I was certainly being vulnerable in letting my story go out, but I think it’s a really important subject because more than half of marriages end in divorce, due to cheating spouses, and yet no one talks about it. Well, let’s define it. Webster’s dictionary defines Adultery as: voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than that person's current spouse or partner. This is just another example of man’s progressive thinking - because this definition does not even come close to the biblical explanation. In fact, there is so much room for being off course! This just reminds of what Jesus said, “Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble! Such things must come, but woe to the person through whom they come! If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire. And if your eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell.” Matthew 18:6-9 Do me a favor, forget the common definition of adultery, and take a closer look at what God says. First, lust is NOT love. Lust is the feeling we get when we follow the flesh - not the Spirit of God! Lust comes in many forms, but it’s basically any human desire that takes our eyes off of God. And we just read that if our eye causes us to stumble and fall into sin, then we should gouge it out and get rid of it! Adultery in scripture is less about the actual act of sex, and more about breaking a marriage covenant. Adultery is an act that has been committed by every human who has ever existed towards God. God’s number one command is to love Him above everything else. And not one person has been able to put Him first, all the time, except Christ. And this my friend is why the Father calls Jesus his “One and Only Beloved Son.” Jesus is the only creation who willing and completely sacrificed His life for God. Only the Lamb of God was worthy to open the scroll! Adultery was never really about sex outside of marriage, although that is the human representation of what adultery is. Adultery is having a lustful attachment with someone else other than your spouse. It can be emotional or physical. It’s all about the desire of the heart. In Matthew 19 we see Jesus’s disciples asking, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, is it better not to marry?” Jesus said, “All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: For there are eunuchs (People who are celibate) who were born thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs (People who are celibate) who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs (People who are celibate) who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it.” Matthew 19:10-12 You see, celibacy is about abstaining from behaviors that break the marriage vow. Celibacy is a desire to keep oneself pure. And just like Peter had to learn that it’s not what goes in but what comes out, regarding food - we too need to understand that purity is about protecting the heart and giving it all back to God. “Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept. “And at midnight a cry was heard: ‘Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!’ Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ But the wise answered, saying, ‘No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.’ And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut. “Afterward the other virgins came, saying, ‘Lord, Lord, open to us!’ But he answered and said, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.’ “Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.” Matthew 25:1-13 The answer to adultery is this - When your heart is right with God, your marriage can withstand any test! And when a man and a woman are One, and tied to the cord of God, nothing can separate them. Adultery between humans, illustrates hearts that are already broken apart. Voluntary sex with someone outside the marriage covenant is grounds for separation and divorce because the marriage agreement has already ended, and been determined as null and void. The union is contaminated. And even if two people stay together, the act has already happened. The sin is already done! And ONLY the blood of Jesus can rectify it. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.” Matthew 19:7-9 Unfortunately, humans are excellent at spreading disease! Sex outside of marriage is just another example of this. God, Please forgive us! Help us to have hearts only for you. Thank you for your Son who saves us from all our sin, and brings us back into marriage covenant with you. You are good, and we love you.
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